A Baby Shower Poem

(September 30, 1993)

I for one think Barney and Baby Bop are annoying but cute,

    So when I was informed that Marlene had given them

a thumbs down, my first thought was, "Oh, Shoot!

    What sort of baby shower would it be without them?"

I thought and I thought "There must be something I can do."

    And there on the shelf in Pick 'n Save was the answer.

It was brilliant. What could she do?

    Only admit that a superior mind had found a way around her.

Since Barney and Baby Bop had been given the Book

    I reasoned, What better gift for Marlene's baby Boy

Than a gift from Barney himself,

    Bags with which the little fellow could take home his Loot? 

So contained in this present are 8 Barney Loot Bags.

    On which Marlene can cheerfully gag.

She can stop being a drag and let the baby learn to shout out

    what Barney and his crazy songs are all about.

I can see a day,

    when Marlene will have to sing over & over again, 

"I Love you, you love me, we're a happy family."

    Just to put Junior to sleep without resorting to belting him.

Marlene will learn some day,

    not to wave a red flag in front of me.

Saying NO BARNEY could only make him show up today.

    I only wish I could have afforded a Barney Striptease.